Wednesday, August 31, 2011

I am my brain. My brain is attached to my body. I think health and peace and my body reacts accordingly.

Friday, July 8, 2011

Journal entries [circa 2001-2007]

There is a lot more to these entries than what I've extracted - but for your sake I have omitted the less coherent parts or parts that paint me less sane than I am comfortable.

What we can invent is bounded by our imagination, and our imagination is bounded by the mental material we have to manipulate. Until one thinking entity (computer?) knows everything the word impossible will always exist.

Science is also a religion.

"He who does not cherish life stands to lose it carelessly."

Please don't fear the reaper.

I am surprised at myself for having a document of this kind. I am obviously either exploring my own creativity or I really need a friend.

I am a mystery, even to myself.

#7 (13/6/04 "Our Betrayal")
Truth is for the ignorant
Faith is for the blind
Hope is for the meek
Trust is for the inept
Love is what those unable to support themselves
or satisfy themselves have for those entities
they cannot be happy without
Hate is for those too prided in themselves
to admit their own weaknesses
I have the choice to be satisfied or not
Emotion is for those who will die
to make the meantime more interesting.
Death is for the impatient
I didn't need to live, no one did
I never gave consent to be created
Life is for those out of control
Give me power, give me strength
give me satisfaction but not a reason to live
Just give me the reasons we know
and acknowledge our own existence
Fear me for I am NOT YOU
For I fear You for not being ME
Jesu art our saviour, in our blindness
we have stumbled from the path
make us right
in the eyes of our Father

"You dare go where angels fear to tread."

Who am I to be so luck ridden?


The will to write.

If it's an hour of power, it's an hour of typing.

Heck, I could just keep typing for the next couple days. Wouldn't that make for really interesting reading!


Welcome again dear Reader to my blog "Week now, to let me see your pain".

Post, post, post, postie, post post. Typie type type.

Yeah, so back when I used to write everything down I would just keep writing a single sentence until there was nothing on the page but a pure unadulterated stream of consciousness hitting the page in a slow progression of immediacy and truth that no thought were crossing my mind other that these very words now laid out before you ahahaa how about that for live crosses to the inner workings of one said Author of a blog that you are now reading hahahaah oh boy am I taking you for a ride this is going to be a hell of a jouney you are going to go through the deepest darkest most frightful recesses of your mind and mine that you will come out having survived a great adventure and wrought your name in the annals of history with a chest of treasure on the back of your pony whos name is sam.

That went well.

I want to talk around the issue of manhattan island.

"Fake it till you make it"

It's time for a new blog. Invariably your author comes out with a cypher for a title. He would like to say "Not so.".

In this age driven by new technology and understandings we are more aware than ever before of the human condition. We have previously unheard of advantages at our disposal to capitalise upon it's weaknesses, and subvert it's defences. In a recent article on emotion sensing glasses on New Scientist it was found that in minute changes to a persons face during conversation, the true feelings going through their minds at the time were laid bare. Such technology renders a person's fa├žade transparent, despite their efforts to cover it up their emotions with language and mannerisms.(See

I wonder what would happen if you put these glasses to the test versus a highly skilled method actor. Years of experience in living life in front of an audience/camera for all intents and purposes portraying as well as FEELING the emotion they act.

Many method actors also face issues, at times their personality affects their acting and vice versa. In spending so much time inhabiting a different personality are there structural effects on the brain? Because of this forced concentration on subversion of existing personality is the actor BECOMING the character?

Known as cerebral plasticity, and when put to good use, we can train ourselves to be better at things like memory or perception, and in turn our minds and the physical brain that supports it change.

This is also true of perceived negative effects, that if I were to live hastily and without thinking my brain would adapt to this level of activity, and conversely if I were to act intelligently I would gradually be better at decision making and situational understanding.

Are some people brains faster in this change or is everyone's brains able to change, albeit at the same rate?

"Fake it till you make it" identifies a "self fulfilling prophecy" that by acting in such a way for long enough there is a trend that in acting a certain way you are training yourself to be that certain way.

Similar to my previous posts, and in quotes I like to keep around mental sovereignty and positive self talk or mental lucidity I would like readers to know that everything inside your mind is true - and the more that this truth stamps out it's place as part of you the more control you have over yourself. Willpower is something that comes with practice, that when you feel momentum behind you pushing you onwards, keep going. It will take you places and before you know it you're somewhere. Rather than nowhere.

Also, the closer to the speed of light you get the less you are affected by time. So when you have a busy day and before you know it you've reached the end of the day, you have actually travelled through time faster. Not a huge amount.

Anyway, you have all the weapons you need. Now fight.

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

An age old lesson

There are infinite worlds within your imagination - and in each of them everything is true.

There are worlds where you are sovereign, where none can defeat you, where every weapon is your own.

It is in these worlds where you are safe, where none suffer, where you are at ease.

These worlds call to us, through their characters, which appear as bunnies, magicians, and audiences alike.

It is these characters, that call to us, that speak louder than our own minds and that will shout through a thousand soundproof walls to let us know they're there.

And for the thousands of battles, skirmishes and melees. They have thousands of salves, bacta, and potions. Thousands of shields, walls, and moats. Thousands of knives, ICBMs, and singularity cannons.

And we will win. How could we not. With every troop to our disposal, every ability at our command, and every weapon in our arsenal. Victory is ours alone...

These victories are real. These battles, are real. These worlds, are real.

As real as the mind that conjured them.

So when we look inwards and feel that the fight has left us. That we cannot sally on. That defeat is imminent.


In there. Where we are sovereign. Where we are the Creator. Where there is no greater power than ourselves.

We find all the weapons, all the defences, all the support - we will ever need.

"Daeldala betrayed us - to ourselves."

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Live Below the Line

I know change is generational, and that the collective memories of a population inspire apathy towards the future beyond their lifetime. But to me this is all there is. An all consuming desire for a future free from intolerance, injustice, greed and callousness.

I will be the change, part of a new generation of individuals who will go forth with a purpose beyond our years. I will make a statement of our intent through actions, not words. Like the african proverb, "each one, teach one", for the greatness of the human spirit is not in the individual but in the love we have for our fellow beings.

There is nothing I can type here, or say to you over the internet or in person that will convince you of my resolve. So it will be by my actions, in the public sphere, that will prove to you my purpose.

I am but a steward, and my reign is short, but I am here to ensure that the future of this domain is secure.

Right now there are 1.4 billion people living in fatal conditions, in a spiral of poverty, in a state of extreme poverty. If one of this number were part of the Australian population they would have $2 in their pocket at the beginning of each day. This constitutes the greatest challenge of extreme poverty - having to choose where to spend your $2 - often in a climate of food shortages, political unrest, racial and gender vilification, and economic oppression.

I paint a grim picture - but with your help we can erase this from the yet to be written future.

Tuesday, April 26, 2011


in pure contravention of the natural order, in utter defiance of the prison of existance. there is no reason, there never has, but for our own reasons without reason. of evolution and of trial and error, of emergeant behaviour, chaos, entropy, existance.

ill get round to the individual lessons soon!